Hello, this is your Christmas correspondent, Editor Des.
Have you heard of a Santa’s Nice List?
Well a lovely lady called Amelia at our village laundromat put one up in her front window. It’s in Wentworth Street at Blackheath. That’s in the Blue Mountains in case you don’t know.
I should be on there!
People could nominate suitable youngsters, but unfortunately (and very unfairly), nobody suggested me. 😪
Anyway, I consider myself extremely nice, so I asked if I could go on the list. Straight away Miss Amelia said ‘Of course you can sweet Desmond!‘
Yesterday I persuaded my guardian Pauline Conolly to take me up so I could show her my name. See, the thing is she doesn’t always appreciate what a little gem I am! This is despite the fact that I gave her all the potatoes I grew this year.
I was looking down the lists for DESMOND C, but much to my horror it didn’t seem to be there. Pauline smirked and said, ‘Looks as if you didn’t make the grade after all Mate. What a terrible shame. Do you think someone caught you smoking?’
Where oh where am I?
OMG!! I did post a smoke & grog pic on social media the other day, but it was just a joke…honestly. Surely nobody told Miss Amelia about that?
And then wretched Pauline started giggling and pointed to a name. ‘Haha. Look, there you are. Oh, how funny. Well you are a bit of a demon, Des,’😃
OH…, !#@!*#!! How can this be?
That’s it! Christmas is stupid and so is Santa.
I’m not one to sulk, but….
FOOTNOTE – Pauline says she has written to the North Pole about Santa’s Nice List and explained everything, but can I trust her? Probably not, because I suspect she had a hand in the corruption of my name.
FOOTNOTE TO A FOOTNOTE – Oh wow, Miss Amelia has put up another list now. I might arrange to have PAULINE C. put on it. That would teach her a lesson, wouldn’t it?
HAPPY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE. AS FOR ME, WELL, I WILL TRY TO RALLY AROUND BY THEN.
